


your eyes betray what burns inside you

by Morgana_Ehran



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Anal Play, Anal Sex, Arguable Trust Issues, Bondage, Bottom!Stiles, Come play, Derek Isn't Happy (As Always), First Time Topping, M/M, Misunderstanding, Porn With Plot, Post 3rd Season, Stiles Is Drama Queen, Stiles is Legal, Top!Stiles, blowjob, bottom!Derek, crackish, discussion of potential violence, mentions of Allison/Scott & Allison/Isaac
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-26
Updated: 2014-12-26
Packaged: 2018-03-03 16:35:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2857622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morgana_Ehran/pseuds/Morgana_Ehran
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles asks Derek how he feels about bottoming. Derek isn’t good at talking. Stiles gets angry a lot, Derek replays Twilight, Scott is uncomfortable and Allison watches gay porn.</p><p> </p><p>  <i>"I can’t believe you borrowed magical ropes from Allison Argent to tie me up,“ Derek mutters. </i></p>
            </blockquote>





	your eyes betray what burns inside you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MonnaMoo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonnaMoo/gifts).



> It takes place sometime after third season. I ignore Allison’s death because I’m in denial (and I want more Allison/Isaac). It’s slightly crackish, so. 
> 
> NOT BETA-READED. Mistakes will be present. You can point them out to me (English isn't my mother-tongue, as you can guess).
> 
> This is a Christmas present for MonnaMoo (she wanted some porn with a bondage so here you go... obviously I can't write a porn without eighteen pages of plot and ridiculous dialogues). 
> 
> I did some embarassing googling (though educational) for this fic but still, if you are up for the bondage, google some real stuff, I'm not an expert and I'm certainly not reliable source. 
> 
> This is my first Teen Wolf contribution. That probably says a lot about me. 
> 
> The title is taken from the lyrics of the song _I Love You_ by Woodkid.

Derek comes from a bathroom, gloriously naked and clean, holding a warm wet towel in his hand. When he sees Stiles half lying on a bed, half lying on a floor, with his face burried in a matress, he frowns and asks dryly: "What the hell are you doing?“

"Uuuuh…“ 

"What?“ Derek grimaces and throws the towel at Stiles. Stiles yipes and rises his head quickly.

"Ow, you jerk!“

"Why are you lying like that? You look funny.“

"Because I can’t decide if it’s my dick or my ass that hurts more so I’m avoiding lying on neither,“ comes sarcastic reply. Derek rolls his eyes. 

"You’re young, you can take it.“

"I have no problem with sex three times a day, I have problem with fucking three times in a row! How come you don’t hurt?“ Stiles pouts.

"I’m a werewolf,“ Derek shrugs. "And you never complained, anyway.“

"I didn’t expect to feel that sore,“ Stiles bickers and lets his head fall onto the matress again. 

"It’ll do you good,“ Derek decides and picks his boxer briefs from the floor. Stiles throws the wet, already cooling towel back at him. Derek catches it easily.

"Don’t be childish,“ Derek says.

"I’m not childish, I’m thoroughly fucked. I can’t be both because then you would go to the jail,“ Stiles smiles sweetly.

"Good that we had waited until you were eighteen then,“ Derek says dryly.

"Technically, I was still seventeen,“ Stiles corrects him.

"Well, that’s because you weren’t able to hold on your pants for another two hours. I wanted to wait till a midnight,“ Derek reminds Stiles and keeps on dressing. 

"Dad was coming back from the afternoon’s shift! It was the best possibility.“

"Your dad was also the reason why we were waiting,“ Derek mutters. 

"An adult who engages in an act of unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor at least two years younger than the adult is liable for a civil penalty…“ Stiles recites. 

"…not to exceed five thousand dollars,“ Derek finishes with sigh. He heard it so often his ears were bleeding. "For Christ’s sake, go take a shower!“

Stiles grimaces but gets on his feet though his legs feel incredibly jelly. Derek gives him amused look. Stiles tries to kick him when he passes him but it ends in him tumbling and Derek just chuckles. Jerk. 

While Stiles is in the shower – and curses during it a lot – Derek changes the sheets. He kind of likes the way it smells after them but Stiles freaks out everytime he finds a wet spot on them. Derek bought more sheets than bread in the last few months. 

Stiles comes from the bathroom, gloriously naked and wet, rubbing his head with a towel so his hair is messier than usual. Derek turns away and smiles. 

"What?“ Stiles narrows his eyes.

"Nothing,“ Derek deadpans. When he wears this expression, Stiles usually starts singing _Conceal, don’t feel_. Then Derek starts to growl and Stiles shuts up for a minute until he starts singing again. "Just that you look so dishevelled.“

"Well, if your boyfriend fucked you through the mattress, you would look dishevelled too,“ Stiles says dryly. Then he grins in his own vicious way and Derek feels uncomfortable already.

"Maybe he should, so you weren’t so gleeful,“ Stiles continues and his bitter mood drops immediately. He leans against Derek’s back, making his clothes wet and wraps his arms around his torso. "He would like to, you know.“

"We talked about it,“ Derek sighs and disengages himself from Stiles‘ hug. Stiles frowns as he watches Derek walk away to pick up his clothes. 

"No, actually we didn’t,“ Stiles crosses his arms. "You just said 'maybe someday‘ which is very vague. And I want to talk about it because 'maybe someday‘ went utopian three months ago.“

"But I don’t want to talk about it,“ Derek says. He passes Stiles his clotheswhich he grabs belligerently and drops them on the floor again. 

"Now, who’s childish? Let me ask you something and then we can go back to not talking about it,“ Stiles snaps.

Derek crosses his arms and glares at him. Stiles takes it as a yes.

"Ok, are you a virgin?“ Stiles asks with a serious face and Derek just blinks at him.

"What? You know better,“ he snorts. 

"I know but I mean, did you ever bottomed?“ Stiles explains and makes some wild gestures with his hands which Derek really doesn’t want to decipher.

"Yes, in fact,“ he admits impatiently. Stiles gapes for about three seconds – he probably didn’t expect it – before he continues.

"Alright and did you like it?“

"Well, yeah,“ Derek replies more reluctantly. Stiles doesn’t look pleased.

"So why don’t you want to do it with me?“ 

Derek looks away and stays silent. Stiles gasps and then laughs bitterly.

"Oh my God, that’s it, isn’t it? You can’t even imagine it, you don’t think _I_ have it in me to top _you_.“

Derek sighs and it seems he is about to say something but he doesn’t. Stiles presses his lips tightly together and starts to get dressed in a rather aggressive way. 

"Stiles…“ Derek starts.

"No, I got it, alright,“ Stiles retorts. „God, what was I thinking, sorry. How could weak, powerless Stiles ever top muscly werewolf, Jesus. What an absurd idea!“

"Stiles!“ Derek barks and looks angry as well. But Stiles is dressed already and he’s shouldering his bag.

"If you excuse us, my fragile bones and I are leaving,“ Stiles spits and walks around Derek. 

"Don’t text me,“ he adds before he slides the door to Derek’s loft open and then shuts it violently. Derek curses to himself.

**

A week passes by.

  
_Stiles talk to me_

**no**

_Come over and let’s talk it over_

**as if you’ll talk about it**

_I will_

**i don’t care anymore**

_You do_

**no**

_Stiles please_

**you think your please will make me swoon? fuck you. oh i can’t can i? fuck you anyway**

_Be reasonable_

**leave me alone**

**

"What happened between you two?“ Scott asks after a lacrosse practice.

"Danny and me?“ Stiles asks in confusion as he sees Danny pass by.

"No,“ Scott rolls his eyes, "Derek and you.“

"Nothing. He’s a dick,“ Stiles shrugs and focuses on undressing.

"He’s always a dick. Something‘s different this time,“ Scott remarks.

"And how do you know, Mr. Seer Werewolf?“ Stiles asks venomously.

"Well, you didn’t mention him once in a week which is weird since you normally don’t shut about him.“ 

Stiles mumbles something.

"And usually when someone mentions you when you aren’t around, he has this almost visible smile,“ Scott continues and gets Stiles attention.

"He does?“ he asks with an honest curiosity. 

"Yeah. It’s small smile but it’s there, you can almost hear his face muscles creak,“ Scotts smirks. 

"And you’ve seen him recently?“ Stiles frowns.

"Yeah, yesterday, we talked about next full moon,“ Scott explains. "Anyway, when I asked him if you talked about it yet, he just growled and looked angry all of sudden. I asked what’s wrong but he didn’t reply.“

"Ah,“ Stiles muttered. "If you must know, we had a row.“

"A row?“ Scott’s face darkens.

"A verbal one. But it wasn’t our usual bickering, you see,“ Stiles grimaces.

"And what were you fighting about?“

"Trust me, you don’t want to know,“ Stiles shakes his head. "Anyway, I’m pretty sure he’d kill both of us if I told you.“

"It’s a sex thing?“ Scott guesses.

"It’s a sex thing,“ Stiles agrees solemly.

"Ok, I don’t want to know,“ Scott admits and rises his hands. "But I hope you’ll make up because Derek seems incredibly wired up and if he kills someone during the next full moon I’m sure he goes to the jail this time.“

"But it’s his fault,“ Stiles sighs. "I’m not coming up to him to apologise because he… well, he insulted me.“

"He insulted you?“ Scott repeats. "Did he say something about your…?“

"What? No! I thought you didn’t want details,“ Stiles makes a face. 

"Yeah, sorry,“ Scott mutters and turns away to put his clothes in his locker.

"Okay, okay. No, it’s complicated. It’s a sex thing but it’s also that he underestimates me which shouldn’t surprise me,“ Stiles says dryly.

"He’s a prick. Should I bite his ass off on the full moon?“ Scott jokes and Stiles snorts.

"It wouldn’t really help the situation.“ They step together in the showers. They choose the sprinkles next to each other. "On the contrary… oh my god, now when I’m thinking about it what if really is something wrong with my dick? Scott, is something wrong with it?“

"Jesus, Stiles, don’t make me look at your dick!“

Danny who’s standing nearby laughs at them.

**

  


**  
**

_I don’t underestimate you_

**don’t talk to scott**

_I don’t, he talks to me_

_It was very uncomfortable_

_Also there’s nothing wrong with your cock_

**i’m turning my phone off**

also i’m poisoning scott with a wolfsbane

**

Two weeks pass by, Derek doesn’t send anymore texts, full moon happens and no one dies. It’s Wednesday and Stiles returns home late because he played Assassin’s Creed at Scott’s. Isaac surprisingly beat their asses but Scott kicked him and made him spin across the room so it was worth it.

Stiles turns on the light in his room and almost jumps out of his skin. Derek is sitting on his bed, looking as cool and composed as ever.

"Jesus fuck! What are you doing here, you stalker? Are you from Twilight or what?“ Stiles snaps mostly because of shock. His heart is pounding violently and Derek even manages to look a bit guilty.

"I’m sorry. I wanted to talk. And you ignored my calls,“ he says as if it justifies everything. Stiles presses his lips together and throws his bag on the floor. He doesn’t bother to shut the door because his dad is still at work. However he doesn’t come closer. He crosses his arms and waits for Derek to start.

Derek gives him a look and after a brief moment of silence he shakes his head and starts talking: "Look, I know I fucked up. But you got it wrong. I don’t think you’re weak.“

Stiles stays silent.

"I did once, okay? But now I know you’re not. I don’t underestimate you.“

Stiles doesn’t say anything.

"It’s not that I can’t imagine it. It’s not about my pride.“ Derek pauses and Stiles snaps.

"What it is about then?“

"I don’t want hurt you,“ Derek says.

"Really,“ Stiles deadpans. Of course, Derek rolls his eyes.

"Well, yes. You’re not a werewolf – “

"What the hell? I thought we were over this already!“ Stiles shouts. 

"God, Stiles, stop it,“ Derek growls and rubs his forehead with his hand.

"Well, sorry, for being imperfect werewolf partner. You are free to go to find some furry friend in the woods and mate with him all you want because I’m tired of this werewolf bullshit – “ Stiles rants angrily and makes Derek stand up and glower so darkly he shuts up. 

"You want me to explain but when I do, you don’t listen,“ he hisses. "I’m tired too, Stiles.“

And then Derek turns around and is gone before Stiles can notice that window was open all the time. He gapes at it and feels so empty it aches.

**

Stiles doesn’t see Derek (or talks to him in any way) for another few days. He feels quite bad but he doesn’t know why since he didn’t say anything he didn’t mean. However he has feeling he stepped over a line and there is no way back. And wasn’t it his worst nightmare? (Except for Nogitsune, really.) Now Derek will certainly leave him for good and find some freaky woman or manly werewolf or whatever he’s into. 

He doesn’t expect Allison to come up to him and ask him if he would tutor her Geography. He knows it’s bullshit because Allison has great marks and Stiles isn’t smarter than her. But he agrees because Allison knows how to shoot arrows and doesn’t take no for an answer. 

They sit in her room. She makes him a coffee, which is really good and smiles at him sweetly. She doesn’t even bother to take out her textbook.

"Tell me about you and Derek,“ she says gently.

"Did Scott tell you something?“ Stiles eyes her warily.

"It’s not as if he had to. But yeah, he mentioned something. And Isaac said he ran into Derek and he nearly mauled him just because he said something stupid. I don’t really know. But Scott obviously didn’t help you,“ Allison explains. Stiles is silent and drinks his coffee.

"You know, he can’t help you. He doesn’t see it from your perspective,“ she continues and her voice is so calm, so warm. Stiles isn’t sure if to hug her or throw a mug in her face.

"Why do you think so?“ he asks finally.

"He never dated werewolf,“ Allison’s smile is amused. "I did. Twice. I think I can say I have some experience.“

"Well, neither Scott nor Isaac are Snow Queens as Derek is,“ Stiles points out. 

"Yeah, that’s true but they are all werewolves and they have similar behavior,“ Allison replies and puts her mug away. "Listen, I just I want to help. I think I can help. So, if you are interested in my help, tell me exactly what happened between you two.“

"And aren’t you worried about the amount of intimate information you could get about us?“ Stiles grimaces. 

Allison laughs. "You’re my friend, Stiles, but it’s no hardship for me to picture you and Derek together. You should see my browser history.“

"Are you for real?“ Stiles gapes at her. She looks positively gleeful. 

"Don’t worry, everything you say stays between us. And I’m not fantasizing about you two so calm down.“

So Stiles starts reluctantly. In the end he tells her more than he ever wanted to. He kind of expects her to start laughing when he brings up his desire to top Derek. She just nods and listens. Stiles realizes he didn’t really believe he could until now. When he falls silent, Allison doesn’t start talking immediately. She takes her time to think about it. Stiles puts his mug to his lips though there’s no coffee to drink now. 

"I have a theory,“ she says after while. Stiles looks at her expectantly and encourages her to continue. "When me and Scott started dating, it wasn’t long after he became werewolf. I didn’t know at first, of course. Sometimes we were making out – no, no, I won’t go into details – and he would stop suddenly. At the time I was confused. After I learnt he was werewolf he told me that when he got really excited he would loose control of his body. He would start to shift.“

"Oh,“ Stiles jerks back in realisation. "Wait wait, but Derek was born werewolf, he never has problems like that. He never started to change when we were… well, you can guess what.“

Allison grins: "Yeah, but what if bottoming triggers something in him? Maybe it’s so hot for him, he can’t keep himself from changing. That would explain why he told you he doesn’t want to hurt you.“

"I don’t know,“ Stiles scratches his cheek. 

"To tell you truth, I don’t think it’s only problem when werewolf isn’t used to control himself yet. Scott had problems with it for long time. And Isaac still does, sometimes,“ she adds and looks dreamy for few seconds. Stiles is creeped out. 

"Wow, okay. But what would you do to keep Scott – or Isaac – from eating you alive?“ 

Allison grins so widely she looks absolutely evil. She leans closer and says in lower and playful voice:

"I know a thing or two about taming werewolves.“

**

Stiles knows how to get into Derek’s loft without setting the alarm on. He chooses the time when Derek’s away (Peter is fortunately out of town too) and waits for him. He feels more nervous than he would expect. So he keeps walking around the loft, checking his phone to see what time it is. Three times he almost leaves. Five times he contemplates to drop the argument and just plead Derek to come back to him. It’s not as if he minds bottoming. He just wanted to ask and he would be fine with bottoming for the rest of their days. 

Except it wouldn’t be Stiles to drop an argument. 

It’s almost evening when Derek finally returns. Stiles is half afraid he won’t be alone (God, what if he brings some werewolf to bed with him?), but he is. Stiles almost sighs in relief when Derek slides the door open.

He doesn’t look surprised but he shouldn’t be. Stiles parked his jeep around corner but Derek can smell and hear him from distance.

Derek shuts the door and comes in wearing his usual scowl. Stiles gets to his feet and keeps his hands behind his back to keep them from fidgeting.

"It’s nice to see you,“ he says awkwardly. Derek glares at him and turns away to get rid of his jacket. 

Stiles feels stupid. But he won’t run away. 

"What do you want?“ Derek asks wearily and turns to him, his arms crossed over his chest. The way his biceps swell makes Stiles salivate.

"I owe you an apology,“ Stiles tears his gaze from Derek’s arms. "I think we both fucked up but you were trying and I was mean and I really shouldn’t say those things. But it hurt, you know?“

"All I’m ever doing is keeping you from getting hurt,“ Derek says.

"Good job,“ Stiles mutters. He wants to slap himself. Derek doesn’t look impressed. "Sorry, sorry. I know. But it doesn’t really work. It’s easy to misunderstand you when you don’t tell me things. I keep guessing and I’m coming to wrong assumptions.“

"That you do,“ Derek agrees. It makes Stiles want to punch him. 

"Well, I wouldn’t have to, if you weren’t so constipated about your feelings! And don’t tell me you were going to explain yourself because I don’t think you would have say what’s really going on,“ Stiles bursts out without really planning to. 

"Maybe I was,“ Derek deadpans. 

"Ok, you can explain it now, I’m listening,“ Stiles encourages him. Derek stays silent. "Oh, jeez, what do you want me to say? I’m sorry, okay? But how can I know you won’t leave me for a first werewolf that strikes you as good enough for you?“

"I thought we were past this,“ Derek gives him back his line and Stiles throws his hands in the air in frustration. 

"Well, obviously we aren’t.“ 

"Stiles, do you think I’m that desperate I’d date human if I wanted a werewolf?“ Derek asks him.

Stiles gapes at him, offended. 

"I wouldn’t be with you if you wasn’t worth it,“ Derek adds and Stiles doesn’t feel offended anymore. 

"Oh,“ he murmurs. It’s the most explicit confession he ever got from Derek and he appreciates it. 

"So stop being paranoid. It annoys me,“ Derek says.

"Well, thank you and everything, I’m glad you said it but why do treat me as inferior then? If it’s not werewolf thing,“ Stiles gestures wildly. God, he himself has problems with a communication. 

"We’re still talking about sex, right?“ Derek huffs. "Are you really that eager to top me?“

"I don’t think you trust me,“ Stiles retors. "It’s not just sex. If you’ve had tell me you don’t like to bottom or you don’t want to, I wouldn’t bring it up again. But you explicitly said you don’t want to do it with me and it hurt. You didn’t deny when I accussed you that you think I’m not fit enough for it.“

"But I don’t think that.“

"So why didn’t you say so?“ Stiles asks.

"I didn’t want you to think I despise you,“ Derek explains and it seems it physically pains him to say all those things aloud. "But I didn’t know how to explain the situation to you.“

"Try words,“ Stiles remarks dryly. Derek gives him murderous look. 

"Fine. I don’t want you to top me because you’re not werewolf and I am. I could hurt you. That’s my point,“ Derek admits and he looks even more frustrated. 

"How could you hurt me? You never hurt me when we were fucking. Ok, once I fell of the bed but it was mainly my fault,“ Stiles waves off the memory. He had bruises and a knob on the head but it was worth it. 

Derek looks reluctant. 

Then Stiles remember Allison’s words and asks very carefully: "Is bottoming intense for you?“

Altough Derek keeps his mouth shut, he looks away from Stiles‘ gaze. 

"Does it make you, um, loose control over yourself? Because only other explanation for your argument that I can think of, is that werewolves have some magical anus that can snap someone’s dick off – “ Derek’s expression speaks for itself but Stiles can endure for the fun’s sake "which I was assured by Scott they don’t though how he can know I’m not sure and I’m masochistically tempted to ask.“ 

Stiles finishes his tirade and looks expectantly at Derek. 

"Please, don’t make guess again and just speak to me. I had to endure two really embarassing conversations for this,“ Stiles pleads because Derek doesn’t seem willing to answer. 

"Yes,“ he mutters finally. 

"So you, in fact, like bottoming? Like a lot?“ Stiles tortures him some more. 

"Yes,“ Derek snaps impatiently.

"Well, why didn’t you tell me in the beggining? We wasted almost three weeks not talking to each other,“ Stiles complains. _And not touching each other,_ he wants to add. 

Derek growls something Stiles can’t decipher. "Wait, it is about pride, right?“

"I didn’t want you to think I’m not able to control myself. I didn't want to scare you,“ Derek admits in the end.

"But it’s awesome!“ Stiles is positively thrilled. But Derek looks at him as if he has gone crazy.

"Stiles, I don’t know about you but I don’t want to bite your head off while we’re fucking. Or ever.“

"But it’s hot,“ Stiles argues. "I mean, not the biting head off part but that there’s something sexy that makes you go crazy.“ 

"See? I know this was bad idea. Because you are crazy,“ Derek points at him. 

"Wait wait wait. Do you trust me?“

"No.“ Stiles rolls his eyes. "It depends.“

"If there was a way how to avoid biting the head of part would you let me fuck you?“ Stiles asks very seriously. 

"Yes,“ Derek says. "But I forbid you to take the wolfsbane anywhere near me.“

"I’m not stupid,“ Stiles snorts. "But in fact, I have very precise knowledge how to make this work.“ Then he goes for his bag and rummages through it. When he pulls out bunch of ropes, Derek’s eyebrows shoot up.

"You think I wouldn’t break those if I started shifting?“ he asks sarcastically.

"Man, these are the special ropes. Not even werewolf can break them,“ Stiles grins at him.

"Where did you get it? Did Deaton give it to you? Jesus, did you consult this with him?“ 

"No,“ Stiles makes a face. "Allison gave them to me.“

"What? You got this from Argents?“ Derek barks. "Are you insane? What if it’s laced with the wolfsbane or a mistletoe?“

"Calm down, do you think I would want to hurt you?“ Stiles shakes his head. "It’s strong but not poisoned. Allison assured me it can’t hurt a werewolf, just keep him tied. She used them on Scott. And she uses them on Isaac, too.“ 

"What?“ Derek looks horrified. 

"Yeah, there are things I didn’t want to learn about my friends too,“ Stiles chuckles.

"Wait, she tied them with these to…?“

"To fuck them, yep,“ Stiles smirks. "And I asked Scott about it and I didn’t really want to hear it but I needed to be sure it can’t hurt you and he said they are actually comfortable because they stretch if you change. Seriously, the look on his face, when he was talking about it, will give nightmares for weeks.“

"I can’t believe you borrowed magical ropes from Allison Argent to tie me up,“ Derek mutters. 

"We don’t have to do it, I just wanted to let you know that if you were up to it, there’s way how to do it. The way how to make it work so we don’t have to worry you'll rip my throat off,“ Stiles adds quickly because though he wants this, he doesn’t want to force Derek into anything. 

Derek looks pensive and just that is enough for Stiles to feel aroused. It’s not always good sign when Derek thinks about something but now it is. Stiles toys with ropes in his hands nervously.

"You know, I won’t be mad if you say no, if you don’t want it this way or another I get it, really. I’m fine with bottoming, you know I like it, in any position, in any place. But I thought that if you like something and would be okay to try it with me, you could, you can,“ Stiles informs him in all seriousness he is capable of. 

Derek eyes him with unreadable look. Stiles drops the ropes so it doesn’t look suggestive. But Derek glances at them and asks:

"When do you have to return them?“ Stiles’s heart skips a beat. 

"Oh, well, I think Allison has the spare ones,“ he makes gesture. "She told me to keep them as long as I need.“ 

"Okay,“ Derek nods slowly. "Let’s try it.“

"Now?“ Stiles gapes.

"Do you want to wait?“ Derek asks and it doesn’t sound like irony. 

"No! As you want. If you want. Whatever,“ Stiles babbles. Just the idea that Derek agrees and wants to do it now, makes him hard. Derek probably picked up the rapid speed of his heart because he smirks and finally comes closer. 

"Jesus, I’ve missed you,“ Stiles mumbles and practically jumps at him to kiss him hard and desperate. How could he survive those two and half weeks? He’s climbing Derek like a tree and doesn’t feel ashamed. Since he feels Derek’s hard-on against his stomach, he‘s pretty sure he understands. 

Stiles fists Derek’s t-shirt and walks them backwards to the bed while they’re still kissing messily. As Stiles legs hits the edge of the bed, he sits down and starts working on Derek’s pants. He curses as he can’t get the belt through its loop. Derek is chuckling. He pulls t-shirt over his hand and throws it away carelessly. Stiles is tugging his pants down and plants kiss or two on Derek’s thighs in process. 

"I’ve missed you so much,“ Stiles repeats and mouths his cock through the boxer briefs. Derek inhales sharply.

"You’re gonna kill me someday,“ he mutters and closes his eyes when Stiles takes him in his mouth. Two and half weeks feel like centuries. 

Derek threads his fingers through Stiles’s hair and enjoys the way Stiles hums in response, sending all his nerves on edge. One of Stiles’s hands settles on Derek’s hip and other makes its way up his torso. Derek takes the hand in his and kisses the knuckles. They glisten with spots of saliva.

Stiles pulls away and kisses Derek’s stomach, rubs his cheek against it. 

"Want you so much,“ he breathes against the salty skin.

"Come on,“ Derek says and pushes Stiles further on the bed, kicking his pants and brief of his ankles. He bents over Stiles, kisses him some more, kisses him deeply and thoroughly, because he likes the way his lips catches on his. Stiles is roaming his hands all over his back, squeezes his ass cheeks and pushes him against himself. Neither of them is sure what they want more – the fraction, hands, mouths, to push in. Stiles is gasping in Derek’s mouth and shuts his eyes. His fingernails digs in a firm but pliable flesh. It feels heavenly. 

Derek scrapes his teeth across his collarbone. He places the open-mouthed kisses along Stiles's shoulder and neck. It’s not sex itself what he missed. It’s the familiar scent, familiar feel of bones under the smooth skin. The way Stiles‘s fast heartbeat echoes in his ears. A pump of blood. All those little gasps and moans. Stiles is never quiet. 

Derek slides his hand down but when he tries to wrap it around Stiles’s cock, Stiles stops him.

"No,“ he breathes out, "too close.“

"You still get to fuck me,“ Derek promises.

Stiles whimpers and bites unconsiously Derek’s lip. He doesn’t mind, it’s gone before the blood starts flowing out. Stiles whispers sorry, and comes. Derek strokes him slowly through it and stops when Stiles collapses on his back. He’s still out of breath, his chest heaving and a few red marks on his shoulders are visible against his pale skin. Once Derek left love bite on Stiles’s neck and while they were both proud of it, Mr. Stilinski had almost the heart attack. Stiles was grounded for two weeks which was absurd because he was eighteen already. They agreed not to repeat the mistake ever again. But Mr. Stilinski is still scowling every time he sees Derek. 

"Just give me a minute,“ Stiles demands and lets his arms fall heavily along the pillow.

"I hope your dad is working tonight,“ Derek murmurs and licks a drop of the come of Stiles’s ribs. It makes Stiles jerk bodily.

"Oh God. I mean, he does, yeah,“ he says quickly. He looks down at his torso where Derek is rubbing circles in his skin. That’s how he likes to mark him, smear the come on him though right now it’s not his own. Stiles likes the sight. The tight pull on his skin after they’re finished is less awesome but he lets Derek anyway. 

"Where are the ropes?“ Derek asks as he’s sitting up. Just hearing those words makes Stiles hard again. He sits up so fast his back crack. Derek snorts and shakes his head.

"Uuum, I left them somewhere around my bag,“ Stiles says. He remembers droping them but he isn’t sure if they fallen back in. 

Derek nods and stands up. Stiles’s eyes wander around his body as he’s moving away, the muscles around his body moving, his walk somewhat ressembling stalk of a wolf. Oh well. 

Derek bends and rummages through the bag until he pulls a bunch of ropes out. He scoops them in his hands and turns back to Stiles. He has to swallow though his mouth is dry as a sand. 

"I guess you know how to use them,“ Derek comments and drops them on the bed. Stiles nods.

"Yeah, Allison showed me a few ways,“ he replies. "It depends on you. I can tie your wrists together, tie them to bed… there was one or two all body japanese bondage thing I’m sure I don’t remember precisely so I’m not really confident about it.“ 

"Tie me so I can’t move,“ Derek orders and Stiles feels his stomach to tighten. 

"Because you like being defenseless or because you’re worried about me?“ he has to ask.

"Because I like you alive and with limbs attached,“ Derek rolls his eyes. 

"But you don’t like being defenseless,“ Stiles reminds him with sigh. "I know the bondage was my idea but I‘d hate to make you feel trapped.“

"I won’t,“ Derek assures him. "I know you won’t hurt me so I won’t be uncomfortable.“ 

"Are you sure? And you better be honest, I don’t want you to develop PTSD because of me.“

"I already have a trauma because of you,“ Derek says dryly. Stiles makes a face. "I’m sure, Stiles. Or do I strike you as someone who would let himself be forced into anything?“

"Okay, point taken,“ Stiles admits and scrambles to his feet. He picks the ropes up, smothing them in his hands, not noticing Derek is watching him with intense look. 

"So, how do you want me?“ 

"I can tie you with arms and legs spread to corners of bed. I’ll use two ropes, stretched under the bed. That way you won’t be able to move but won’t break bedpost. It’s called a spreadeagle – hey, I didn’t name it! – and it’s quite effective but it makes you… well, defenseless,“ Stiles blurts out. 

"It sounds good,“ Derek nods. 

"You can’t break the ropes but they could make your limbs go numb. So you can’t be tied like that for more than an hour. And we should set some rules.“

"Such as?“ Derek rises his eyebrows.

"I’m not mind reader, Derek,“ Stiles starts. "Unfortunately. So you need to tell me if anything’s wrong. If the knot’s too tight, if you feel uncomfortable and want to stop. Anything. I’ll keep the special scissors close by, they can cut the rope if necessary.“

"Okay,“ Derek agrees, "but I have some rules of my own too.“

"Tell me,“ Stiles gestures to encourage him.

"You won’t come near my face or hands or feet with any part of your body. Especially if I start to change. And absolutely no kissing.“

"What? I want kissing!“ Stiles protests and pouts.

"Do you want me to bite your face off?“ Derek asks seriously.

"Weeeell…“

"So no kissing then,“ Derek repeats. Then he turns to the night table and takes something out of the drawer. Stiles gets excited but his enthusiasm goes cold very rapidly when he sees what it is. 

"I want you to put it in your reach and use it, if something goes wrong,“ Derek says with dead serious expression. He’s handing Stiles a taser. 

"No way,“ Stiles shakes his head vehemently. "Why do you even keep it?“ 

"Strangers tend to break in here quite often,“ Derek says dryly. "And Peter lives upstairs.“ 

"You know I could never use it.“ Stiles feels sick just thinking about it.

"Keep it close,“ Derek insists. He practically shoves the taser in his hands. "The end of discussion.“

"I hate you,“ Stiles mutters and puts the taser on the bedside table. He puts the EMT scissors beside it. Then he picks the ropes and smooths two out and puts the rest away.

"Can I lie on my stomach?“ Derek glances at Stiles.

"Whatever suits you best,“ Stiles shrugs, "though I’d like to be able see your face.“

"Well, at least I’ll be sure you won’t do anything funny,“ Derek remarks. "And you’ll have better access to fuck me.“

"I’m having crisis,“ Stiles admits and his face goes hot when he hears Derek say "fuck me“.

"Get over it,“ Derek says sarcastically and kneels on the bed. Stiles watches him lie down and reach with his hands and feet to bed corners. The sight makes him salivate. "Good?“

"Yeah, good,“ Stiles’s voice cracks. Then he sits down on the edge of bed and takes hold of Derek’s left wrist. Derek turns his head and watches Stiles’s fingers with relaxed expression. To his surprise Stiles’s hands are steady and his actions are quick and precise. First he makes a small loop, puts it close to Derek’s wrist and starts to wrap the rope around it and through the loop. First time, second time, third time. Then he makes a loop with the end of the rope and knots it. He slips two fingers underneart the wrapped rope.

"Isn’t it too tight?“ 

"No, it’s fine,“ Derek mutters and his calm voice satisfy Stiles enough. So he slips the rest of the rope under the bed and disappears for a minute while he stretches it under the bed. To Derek’s surprise he doesn’t start to tie the other end to his free wrist but his right ankle. He twists his head to watch.

"I need to make the x shape, you know,“ Stiles explains and glances at Derek. 

"Yeah, I forgot,“ Derek comments and admires the way Stiles’s fingers works on knot. That is rather arousing. Stiles makes sure the rope is stretched enough but not too much and goes for the second one.

"You’re good at it,“ Derek remarks. 

"I used to be a boy scout.“

Derek snorts. Stiles starts to work on his right wrist. When Derek looks closer, he finds that he has lips pressed tightly together. His fingers don’t shake but he is nervous. He doesn’t call him on it. 

Stiles gets to his feet again, disappears. Derek turns his head to his left, finding him standing at bed’s feet. When Stiles takes hold of his ankle, he pulls gently to make sure Derek is spread out as he should. Derek’s breath catches in his throat as he rubs against the sheets. Watching Stiles finish his work makes him even harder. 

"How do you feel?“ Stiles’s voice comes from behind him. 

"Like a flying lemur.“ 

"Fuck you, Hale,“ Stiles snorts and Derek can hear the amusement.

"I’m good,“ he adds because he hears Stiles to inhale to ask again.

"Okay.“

The mattress dips and there’s a hand running down his back. Derek closes his eyes and relaxes underneath the touch. It’s Stiles, funny, caring Stiles. He can relax.

Stiles kisses him between shoulder blades and continues along his spine. His inner thighs are touching Derek’s hips and his balls brush against the small of his back. The hand caress his arm and Derek opens his eyes to see those long fingers wrap just underneath the rope loops. 

"Stiles?“

"Hm?“ The voice is closer to his ear more than he would like to but according to the shift of weight above him, Stiles is sitting up. The hand is gone and something rubs against his ass. 

"A lube is in the first drawer. And wear a condom, I don’t like the mess,“ he instructs Stiles. 

"Alright,“ he replies gently. Derek wants to comment there’s no need for courtesy, it’s not his first time after all. Then he remembers it is for Stiles. He never topped before. He turns his head again (thank god he can’t twist it) to see Stiles search through the drawer, scowling a bit. 

"Hey, don’t worry. No one’s good at first time.“

"Oh, thank you,“ Stiles glares at him and Derek has to smirk. "Really, you make me feel so much better.“

"You can change your mind too, you know,“ Derek points out.

"Are you kidding? I don’t want to stop. I’m just nervous,“ he murmurs the last part.

"You’ll be fine,“ Derek says over his shoulder and he isn’t worried. Stiles mutters something to himself. As the mattress moves under his knees, Derek guesses Stiles settled himself between his legs. He shuts his eyes again because he can’t see anything anyway and relaxes his muscles. The position isn’t uncomfortable and he likes the fraction against his half-hard cock. There’s a clicking sound as Stiles opens the lube. Then he closes it and puts it away. 

"Okay?“ Stiles’s breathless.

"Yeah,“ Derek encourages him and tries to push his ass up but his moves are limited. 

Stiles drags one lubed finger down his crack. It feels cold and incredibly wet and it makes Derek gasps as it takes him by surprise. His heartbeat picks up. He is fully hard now. 

Stiles inhales loudly and then he pushes his finger against Derek’s hole. He pushes in slowly, carefully. He can’t be further than by two knuckles and Derek is fighting a moan. He’s feeling as if warm liquid is washing over him. He breathes out loudly to encourage Stiles. It works. More pressure, more warmness. His feet tense, he tries to braces his toes against the mattress but he can’t, ropes won’t let him. It makes it feel even better. 

"More,“ he growls. He hears Stiles makes some kind of sound but he doesn’t know what it was. The finger slips out and Derek impatiently waits until there are two fingers pressing in. He tries to push down. Ropes hold him still. But the stretch he feels both inside and outside is glorious. And Stiles is so good, so intuitive. He moves his fingers slowly, further and back, then he turns them around a bit. The stretch is good. Derek feels something swelling in his chest. All of sudden, the fear overcomes him. His eyelids fly up and he flexes his fingers to see his fingernails. Their human. He sighs. 

"Everything okay?“ Stiles’s sound worried. He had to notice, of course. 

"I just thought I was shifting. My fault. You go on,“ he replies curtly. His heart is still beating rapidly and his fingers shake but he wants Stiles so bad he stops to mind. There are the ropes to anchor him. 

Stiles is not moving. 

"Stiles!“

"Sorry, sorry,“ he apologizes hastily and he shuffles a bit. Then he goes back to fucking Derek with fingers, faster and deeper. More confident. He tries to twist them, rubbing against Derek’s insides. Derek can recognise his own pattern in those moves. It makes him smirk. 

He doesn’t need to ask for another finger, thank god. Stiles didn’t add more lube so it's drier now but Derek doesn’t mind. He feels good, he feels warm. His cock is pressed against already moist sheets and that feels good too. He starts to pant in the mattress, rubbing his open mouth against it. How he would love to kiss Stiles but he can’t, he wouldn’t dare. 

"Now is a good time,“ he breathes out, his voice hoarser and weaker than it normally would be. 

"Oh,“ Stiles stills. Wrong. "Okay.“ Then he’s slowly pulling out. The mattress creaks and his weight shifts. Derek hears the crackle of plastics. Stiles curses. 

"My fingers are slippery, I need to…“ he doesn’t finish and then there’s soft and gummy sound of Stiles' feet on the floor. 

"Stiles?“ Derek twists his head. He doesn’t feel so warm anymore.

"I’m coming! I just need to wipe my hand…“ There’s a rustling sound and then a quick scuttle of his bare feet. "Sorry, sorry, I’m back…“ 

The hand touches Derek’s side and there are a few quick pecks on his shoulder blade. Derek wants to snap at him to keep distance but he’s glad he feels him so close. Stiles presses his knees against Derek’s thighs so he can feel him when he lifts his hands. The plastics rips and Stiles takes few deep breathes. Derek wants to say something to calm him down but he’s still unsettled from being left by himself. About a half minute passes and then Stiles puts his open palm against Derek’s small back. 

"Um, I am…“ Stiles says, sounding nervous and eager at the same time. 

"Yeah,“ Derek nods in the matress. He tries to calm down and relax so it’s easier for both of them.

Stiles takes a deep breath, murmurs something to himself. Then there’s pressure and Derek feels as Stiles begins sink in. His first instinct is to jerk but he keeps himself still, not to give Stiles wrong impression. Stiles is going very slow and he’s shaking a bit. Derek wants to say something to give him confidence but he can’t get himself to speak. The pressure and stretch of Stiles‘ cock makes his blood pump. It’s not uncomfortable at all. 

Stiles pauses for a second and then pushes in again. 

"How do you feel?“ Derek asks over his shoulder. 

"Like Charlie in The Chocolate Factory,“ Stiles sighs.

"Little?“

"Jesus, don’t joke about this, that’s serious stuff,“ Stiles squeaks. "You kidding, right?“ 

"Yes, I’m joking, Stiles,“ Derek rolls his eyes. 

"Because if I’m not enough for you…“

"Stiles, your cock is perfectly fine but don’t talk about it and move it,“ Derek snaps and tries to jerk his hips. It’s small move but it works. Stiles yipes and shuts up. Another pause and then an experimental shallow thrust. Not much but Derek makes a low sound to encourage him. Stiles tries again, this time deeper. Derek flexes his hands. Stiles leans more in, pressing his stomach against Derek’s ass. It makes it better. He repeats the thrusts. Derek can tell he’s holding back. So he jerks his hips again, making Stiles gasp. As he’s thown out of guard and he pushes in harder. That’s it, that’s what Derek wants. He growls lowly, not really planning to. He fists his hands, not being able to hold on anything and burries his face in sheets, biting on it. 

Stiles has to see what he’s doing because he thrusts like that again. And again. His moves are more firm now. He’s not shaking anymore. Derek hears his shallow and broken panting. He’s doing so well. And those noises make it all even better. Derek gets lost in it. He’s getting lost in himself too. 

He feels his fingernails grow long.

His eyes snaps open and he starts to panic again. He wants to fight it but he can’t focus. Everything is a glowing blurr. 

"Let go,“ Stiles whispers. Although Derek is sure he won’t forget himself entirely, he is afraid to change. He trusts Stiles, he does, however he can’t loose control over the situation. Stiles might accidentaly scratch himself or something. He can’t let it happen. 

So he bites harshly on the sheet. It’ll be ripped, there are holes already but it’s not big deal. His fingernails dig in his palms and the pain is making him focus better. Pain against pleasure. Like that. 

"Derek!“

Derek’s head jerks up at his name. There’s blood underneath his hands but the skin is untouched. 

"The ropes are here to help you,“ Stiles says breathily. He slowed down. "Trust them.“

Derek doesn’t reply but eases his muscles. As Stiles goes back to faster pace, he watches his fingernails grow. _Let go,_ he hears Stiles’s voice in his head. 

Then Stiles straightens up, changing the angle just so slightly but it makes a great difference. It’s more intense now. Derek feels every inch of Stiles‘ cock. It’s perfect. He knows his eyes are glowing blue and when he growls, it’s not human sound. It doesn’t go unoticed to Stiles. He groans and digs his fingers in Derek’s sides. _Yes yes yes._

The sound of rushing blood fills his ears. His skin is moist and cold from sweat and the air is spicy with musk. That and Stiles’s harsh breathing and the hardness of his cock. Derek growls again, louder and hoarser, and comes. 

Stiles goes still when he realises what happened. Then he’s pulling out gently.

"No no, stay,“ Derek pants. He feels his teeth and claws getting back to human form. "You can carry on.“ 

"I want to do it another way,“ Stiles says and pulls out completely. Derek wants to ask what he means but then he sees Stiles bending over him, loosening the knots on his wrist. Though he wants to protests, he remembers Stiles said they need to change position because of the blood circulation. Anyway, it’s a sight as Stiles hastily undoes the ties. He picks up Derek’s wrists and kisses them and rubs his palm against their inner side. When he does the same to the other hand, he moves down to untie his feet. Derek stretches his arms carefully. Then he feels the ropes slide off his ankles.

"Should I roll over?“ he looks over his shoulder. He is nearly knocked down by Stiles who falls on top of him and starts kiss him in earnest. That’s fine with Derek. He rolls on his back (his muscles protest a bit) and runs his hands along Stiles’s body. He missed that. 

Stiles straightens suddenly. His voice cracks: "I want to come on you.“

"Okay,“ Derek agrees, little dazed with Stiles‘s exigency. Stiles sits back, leaning back a bit at Derek’s rised legs. He’s strandling his hips now, knees by his sides. Then he looks down at himself and takes off the condom, throwing it away hastily. Derek watches him intensely, putting his hands on Stiles‘s thighs. As Stiles takes himself in hand, he looks up at him. He isn’t sure if Stiles waits for approval, but he nods anyway. Then he glances between Stiles’s face and his hand moving over his cock. The way Stiles narrows his eyes and open his mouth to gasp out is making Derek stiff again. 

Stiles’s hips jerk and he comes over Derek’s stomach, where his own come is already smeared. Derek strokes Stiles‘ legs and expects him to collapse on him because Stiles is theatrical even during sex. But he stays there, strandling Derek, with his head hung down. Derek waits for him to say something but he doesn’t which isn’t like him. He’s almost calling him on that when Stiles dips his fingers in the mess on Derek’s chest. Then Derek understands. Stiles rubs their mixed come in his skin. Derek’s breath catches in his throat. 

"So,“ Stiles sighs happily as he lies down beside Derek, leaning in to peck him on lips. "That was awesome.“

"We should do it again,“ Derek smiles, but just slightly. 

"Oh, definitely,“ Stiles grins widely and nudges him with his shoulder. "Maybe you should tie me up, next time.“

"If you show me how,“ Derek shrugs but it’s not bad idea. Actually, it’s quite picture, in his mind. 

"Absolutely,“ Stiles nods. He’s still smiling like idiot. And he somehow managed to get his hair so messy it sticks to every direction. It’s nice sight too. 

"So… was it good for you?“ Stiles asks, of course he asks. 

"Were you even there?“ Derek gives him a look. 

"Next time you shouldn’t worry so much about shifting,“ Stiles says as he puts his head on his crossed arms. He kicks Derek’s calf lightly. 

"It wasn’t so bad,“ Derek admits and puts one of his hands under his head. 

"See? I knew it,“ Stiles grins and then mutters: "I should send Allison a fruit basket. Or tie Isaac for her.“

"Don’t even joke about it,“ Derek warns him with murderous glare. It makes Stiles laugh. They fall into comfortable silence. Stiles is running his fingers lightly over Derek’s chest, making circles where the come has dried. Derek smiles at ceiling. 

"Derek?“

"Hm?“

"If you half shifted while I was fucking you, does it make me a half zoophile?“

Derek hits him pedagogically on the back of his head.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm morganae on tumblr, come to say hi and cry about sterek with me.


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